Chapter 34
Chapter 34 – Thanksgiving
On Thanksgiving Day, the men hold a raucous party on the base. Yossarian turns in early to avoid getting hurt (there are many fights), but is soon awakened by the terrifying sound of machine gun fire directly over his tent. He rushes out of bed with his .45, and discovers that someone is firing of rounds from a sand-bagged machine-gun emplacement for fun. Yossarian, enraged that someone has yet again put his life in danger unnecessarily, is ready to kill, but the troublemakers run into the forest. Nately tries to stop Yossarian from pursuing them, but Yossarian punches him in the nose and continues the fruitless pursuit.
In the morning, Dunbar and Yossarian report to the hospital with feigned illnesses, only to discover Nately in bed with a broken nose. Yossarian apologizes, and there are no hard feelings. Also there is the Chaplain, with “Wisconsin shingles,” another fabricated disease, and Nurse Duckett, who is no longer seeing Yossarian. The Chaplain comments that for the first time in his life, he is committing a sin (lying) and that it feels great.
The atmosphere of levity is broken suddenly when Yossarian and Dunbar see a soldier in bandages and casts from head to toe. “He’s back!” they scream in terror, and the entire ward descends into insane chaos. According to Yossarian, they recognize his as the same man by “the two stiff arms and the two stiff, thick, useless legs drawn up,” despite the fact that “he had lost a few inches and added some weight.” Dunbar then begins to shriek that there is nobody at all inside, and jumps up on the bed to look through the mouth-hole.
The MP’s arrive, quiet everyone down, and arrest Dunbar. Nurse Duckett takes Yossarian aside and warns him quietly that they are going to “disappear” Dunbar. Yossarian does not understand what this means, commenting that it is not even correct grammar.
